Authentically Congruent


The state of being awake and aware, building upon my last post about awareness, is a complete, embodied knowing that freedom of expression is possible. With this sense of freedom also comes less fear – and visa versa. My expression had taken a massive hit to the point of being completely shut down by the age of 14. It’s finally now just resurfacing and through many years of growth, there’s a solid foundation for it to stand upon.

I love the experience that comes from not being attached to outcomes – there’s an amazing freedom that’s possible. Becoming unattached from societal norms and expectations allows me to take more of an observer role as I am then able to more freely experience different emotions. We each have our own expression that is free to be felt without judgment. It’s great to feel angry, just to sit with it or take it out on a punching bag! Anger can also be a useful emotion that inspires right action and can help with raising us from depression. It’s when the anger spills out onto others, that shows us there’s an unhealed issue from our past that’s been triggered.

At the end of the day, your expression is your expression, but in the case of a heavy-negatively-laden feeling, it’s always a good practice to take a step away, preventing it from spilling out onto others. Healing past wounds, getting underneath all the programming and negative beliefs is the journey to freedom and true self-awareness.

Speaking of anger, I had an incredible, surprising experience last week at work which allowed a past wound to become exposed. Part of my job at work is to raise a height-restricted barrier for our contractors with large trucks so they can enter our parking lot. We have a camera on the barrier so we can tell when someone is waiting to come in. I happened to be looking at the camera and saw a large van with roof racks move towards the barrier. I was going to open the gate when I noticed this guy continuing on underneath it, the top of his van hitting the bottom of the barrier as he kept pushing forward.

One person’s perception of reality can vary greatly from another’s, however during this time of history, the division is becoming more and more pronounced. I’ve really noticed this on a large scale through a neighborhood group app (county wide) I joined. I find the topics very interesting and the opinions that are shared, sometimes quite shocking. It’s clear to me that humanity is experiencing a bifurcation: the division of something into two branches or parts, as the sharing on this app clearly demonstrates.

We are on public property, and this barrier is publicly funded by tax payers and here we have this guy causing damage. I’ve seen it happen before and shake my head. On his way out of the parking lot, it looked like he at least caught on because he stopped before the barrier so it could be opened for him. OK good, he’s learned that his van is too high to go underneath.

Several hours later, here comes the same van – plowing through the barrier – again. I was like – WTF man? This really fired me up. I leaped out from my desk and ran outside yelling “HEY, HEY YOU!!” He was quite far away and I had to run through the parking lot to get to him – I didn’t want him to get away. I made it up to him and started expressing myself towards his blatant disregard for public property. Yes, I was angry!

I put it all out there, including all the thousands spent on fixing the barrier from people doing the same thing. Anyway, all he could say is: “There’s a nicer way to speak to someone instead of “HEY YOU!” I just kept talking. He was getting nowhere with me and after a while he walked away. He never did take responsibility. I guess with me yelling at him . . . oh well. It was a wake up call for me, uncovering some latent anger from my past.

I manifested you!

At the time, I felt completely justified confronting this man. I’ve been feeling helpless or rather powerless lately on an unconscious level. Turns out I’ve had been triggered by someone who is like my father – a False King of Tyranny, someone who ‘rules’ over all. This van driver provided me with an outlet and an opportunity for me to see I had a lot of pent up anger and rage just waiting to be poked. Thank you to this man who helped me see. It was ok to confront him with his behavior, just not ok to yell my head off!

The good part was that this experience provided a new influx of energy for self-expression. I had been slipping down into a feeling of powerlessness and was shutting down again, just like I did when I was a small child around my father. During my recent experience, I felt a very strong energy come in and lift me up from my chair, take me outside and confront the van driver’s behavior. The fear of keeping me in my seat with my mouth closed had vanished. I’ve hit my limit on the cap of self-expression. If this is how it’s showing itself – so be it. Whatever it took to get me to this place – I am grateful.

Being authentically congruent

No more restrictions, no more labels, no more ceiling on my expression. Thank you God. I know this is a process and this is where I’m at presently as my self-expression establishes itself. Great. Again, no judgment here. I’m freely allowing my process to unfold and am amazed what’s showing up. It’s liberating indeed! I am also being very careful with the physical expression of my emotions. If anger like this arises again, I’ll put it to work on a home project! I know better than to take it out on someone – not a good thing to do. Covering up anger by shutting down all feelings isn’t a good thing to do either. Feeling it, accepting it and not judging it is the best thing to do – and with that I remain authentically congruent!

Authenticity: How to be Authentic

Otherwise, the alternative is to remain a slave to fear from past wounds.

You have the means to do this now, to feel your feelings and emotions as they arise. Allow them to flow, feeling each one fully and completely, allowing them to surface until they have passed. Same goes for happiness and joy too! As we know things change, best to enjoy these feelings when they are present!

Pertinent Posts:

Authenticity: Being True to Yourself

I hear the word “authentic” a lot.  It’s one of those words that have an assumed meaning, like one we can almost pull out of our heads to describe.  I wanted to focus on this word specifically and apply it to my own life.  I wanted to know if I was being authentic.  Being genuine…

Ending Negative Self-Talk

Negative beliefs and self-talk are very destructive to ourselves and others, mostly because we believe these negative things we tell ourselves are true. This is mainly because we identify with them and use “I am” in front of things like being a burden, weak, not worthy, a mistake . . . It’s not true.  You’re…

How is Your Emotional Health?

You can improve your chances of being healthy and happy by allowing all emotions to be felt in the kindest, gentlest way.  This opens the door for freedom and allows self-love to be your guide.



11 responses to “Authentically Congruent”

  1. Julia Preston Avatar

    Your experience reminds me of a similar one—as a member of the board of directors of my condo building, one go my roles was to play the “rules police”. Not a fun job, but a necessary one. Rather than parking in a designated spot for large vehicles, a moving truck backed down our garage ramp to unload. I politely asked him to move because he was blocking entry to the garage. He flat out REFUSED. Period. End of report. I lost it and let him have it with both barrels. It certainly gave me an opportunity to do some self-inquiry about why I reacted as I did, and how I felt about it, how I might have handled it differently, and if there was way that I could do a “mulligan” (a do-over). Sometimes I think these things spring up out of nowhere to show me where I need a little tweaking. It can be mighty uncomfortable to experience these unsettling moments, but somehow, in the end, it always results in inner healing. I’ve had lots of practice! Thanks for sharing your story—it’s so good to know that we’re all in this together!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The Path to My Heart Avatar

      Hi Julia! Thank you for sharing your experience – totally can relate as it sounds just like what happened with me. It provides loads of food for thought and processing. I actually just wrote a new post about it – how it contributed to me finding a context for which to place it in. Would I do a mulligan? No. Could I have handled it differently? Yes, absolutely. We move on, without judgement, hopefully gaining some insight.

      I would not want your position as a condo rules police. I wouldn’t last one day! lol That job would surely try my patience and I would end up quitting! It’s not for me. I understand the need for it and send you loads of Grace! But, yes, you’d get loads of practice!! Have a great day and good to know we’re all in this together!! YES!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Julia Preston Avatar

        Happily, my rules policing days are behind me and I now live happily ever after in the quiet space of my own condo and heart. It was a five-year gig, and painful though it could be at times, it certainly was rife with personal growth and awareness opportunities. What a classroom. ThankGod I graduated and moved on to different curriculum where new learning abounds! It never ends, does it?

        Liked by 1 person

        1. The Path to My Heart Avatar

          I’d say that was the job that kept on giving! No, it doesn’t end, as we continue to clear out the old. Some day though, I believe we will restore to our intended selves!!

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Julia Preston Avatar

            Indeed!! I’m keeping the faith! 🙏🙏🙏

            Liked by 1 person

  2. Sue Dreamwalker Avatar

    I hear you Donna, the time is indeed over for keeping silent… And as I read and listened to your post.. I know how they attach labels so it separates, and causes division.
    And it is used as a good excuse to shut people up from speaking their minds. because we are then given an Anti this or that label.. etc..

    When you truly wake up to the programming we have ALL of us been indoctrinated with from our cradles, first by our parents, then teachers, employers friends, and colleagues.
    We are then placed into more categories of left or right, conservative or labour. Working class, or blue collar, Rich, Poor…. Black, White.. the lists are endless..

    And all the while we grow from children into adults, we are absorbing the labelling, until we believe we are the label..

    So we get ourselves LOST within understanding just who we are.. Because we are told we are unworthy, timid, dumb, thin, fat.. quiet or boisterous. So many labels..
    We are also taught not to say a certain things because is Not Politically correct.. So we hold back our authentic selves and our natural responses… Watching our P’s and Q’s…. so as not to offend others… While inwardly wanting to speak our truth..

    I think often of my own childhood… ‘Speak when spoken too’… and ‘Little Children should be seen and not heard’, comes to mind…. All adding to our adult identities of fearing to speak up and out… Because in my day speaking out of turn, got you a clip around the ear! 🙂

    Yet having said that… We were also taught Respect for our elders.. and others, Something which I see diminishing in today’s world, when young teens not all mind you, but some, hold no respect for their elders… because they are not disciplined so they feel they can get away with being rude to their elders..

    The man who ran the barrier.. His vehicle probably wasn’t his vehicle either so he had no respect for the barrier damage or the damage it would to to the van..

    Sometimes Donna… We can no longer stay silent… We have to shout! in order that others even listen… And at times Donna, I am ready for a Megaphone! .. 🙂

    Another thought provoking post Donna.. thank you x 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    1. The Path to My Heart Avatar

      Hi Sue – yes, how true all the labels and categories that get piled up on from birth. My parents were republican, so then I must be too – things like that, or we go the total opposite just because – without any heart or real thought behind it. They are really useless things. Children should be seen and not heard – I think that saying was heard around the world because it shows up everywhere. Funny how some things go ‘global’? You’ve got a point – I never thought that the van that guy was driving might not have been his, but it makes perfect sense. Why would you mar, scratch or potentially damage your own vehicle if it can be helped? It really is mind blowing the blatant disregard.

      My actions were not normal for me, I couldn’t help myself in this instance. Something took over. I think I’ve had enough of watching us get run over and hurt by so-called ‘people’ who say they are ‘helping’ humanity. Something has shifted within me, perhaps more people are waking up and they are questioning. It’s a good sign!! But, yes, things are happening for the good!!

      Thanks again Sue for all you contribute to people and how you spread your truth out there! Much appreciated! Sending lots of blessings! Much love to you my friend!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Sue Dreamwalker Avatar

        Sometimes Donna I feel our actions are often instinctive as every action has a reaction so to speak… Something often drives us to react… Yours was seeing wilful destruction needlessly so as they had already been warned previously of the hazard…
        I feel many people are going to hit their own barriers sooner or later, as things come crashing in on them…
        And many of us have been trying in our own ways to help Humanity See the barrier before it falls in on them… But they go blindly ahead anyways…
        Sometimes you feel you need to shout in order to be heard and understood…

        We each I feel are getting our own signs.. One way or another… Maybe that van driver needed his own wake up call to be shouted at!.. Maybe he had to experience that too…
        But I know too, that while we hold tolerance, we do no longer suffer fools gladly either… And the time to speak when we feel we have something that needs saying, rather than sitting and watching self destruction, is something we are each now facing in various degrees…
        Its way past time… To be Authentic.. and true to ourselves.. ❤

        Liked by 2 people

        1. The Path to My Heart Avatar

          Well said Sue. I have to trust what was there for me to do. And like you said – I have no idea what that man received or if even what I said went in. I don’t know his take-away from the interaction was. I do know I went to work Monday morning (filling in for a colleague) and turns out our barrier is (still) broken since that man’s entrances and exits on Friday. I’ve had enough of seeing willful destruction cause damage. Things are surfacing, emotions, memories, frustrations and I have to just let them come without judgment. It was a good experience – no regrets! At the end of the day, I was being congruent and authentic – nothing hidden there!! Much love, Donna

          Liked by 1 person

  3.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    love the authentic expression living through you… great post … x

    Liked by 2 people

    1. The Path to My Heart Avatar

      Thank you very much! Glad you stopped by!

      Like

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